actions vs words

i've been thinking a lot about actions and words. the common phrase we all know, "actions speak louder than words," is hitting home pretty hard tonight. i remember a few years ago when i was describing the actions of a friend to a new friend of mine. i remember their shock when i told them the person i described was a friend. they responded by telling me that the person i described wasn't a friend at all.

i don't even remember what the person had done, but i remember the actions being the part that stood out. the part that mattered. how often do we examine our actions? how many times have i said one thing and done another? sometimes i think we're all hypocrites by nature, and we have to actively be trying to do what we believe in--it just doesn't come naturally.

why is that? is it hard for everyone to do what they believe in? does everyone struggle to back up what they say? am i the only one who says i love others and then put myself first and ignore everyone else's needs? should we even be allowed to say these things if our actions aren't backing up what we say?

i'm tired of my words not reflecting my actions. we're all just living huge lives of lies by continuing this pattern of actions not reflecting words. i need to remind myself what it means to love others, and then let my actions do the talking...